Sinking in

The vacation is truely and completely over. I realized that today the moment I woke up.

Though I am still in the India time zone (which makes me feel like I have woken up way early in the morning India time, but actually I am way late as per Singapore time), I have been able to reach office at a decent respectable time today. Poeple around me keep telling me that I look refreshed from the holiday. Maybe they are just being polite, but that's the last thing I feel.

The last week in Mumbai, what with all the partying with friends and the entended chats and the eruption of emotions, was a completely exhausting seven days of my life. Not that I would miss a single day. If given a chance, I would probably do exactly what I did every single day. Well, maybe I would have done one thing differently, but then....who's keeping track?

So it's back to the grind. Back to the routine. Back to the things that promise to make us sane, but actually drive us insane.

One change, though. I have completely stopped smoking.

This is, and was of course, according to plan. I had decided even before I left on vacation that I would not smoke the moment I landed here in Singapore.

The decision was more in terms of my long term health. I am in my early thirties now and if I keep abusing my body the way I do now, I will be in real trouble when I reach my fourties. This is the start of the corrective action I want to take so that I will have a livelier and healthier life when I am older. That way I can spend more quality time with my daughter as she grows up. That way I can play tennis with her rather than watch her play. I can dance with her rather than watch her dance.

So, as I had decided, I have not smoked since I landed here 3 days ago. Forget smoking, I have not even thought of having a smoke the last couple of days. In fact, I stood talking to a collegue of mine as he smoked and did not have the slightest temptation to do it myself. As I knew my mind would switch off just as it has.

The only test that remains, as per a lot of my pals who are skoffing, is when I am having a few drinks with my friends. They claim that only if I avoid smoking then will I have truely quit. They'll see. They haven't seen my resolve.

"Father, forgive them. They know not what they do." :-)